Fiona Xie admits she lacked responsibility when she was a young actress, regrets not thinking about others

We have all made mistakes and have regrets about the past, and former Mediacorp artiste Fiona Xie is no exception.

In the latest episode of the meWATCH talkshow Hear U Out, the 38-year-old — famous for playing Lu Kaixin in the 2004 Channel 8 drama The Champion where she sprinted down Orchard Road in a bikini — confessed that she "lacked a sense of responsibility" when she was a young actress and has regrets since then.

"It was only after I established my own company that I realised and understood how tough things were and how a single decision could affect so many people," she told programme host Quan Yi Fong.

Recalling the time they worked together on several variety programmes, Yi Fong, 46, told Fiona: "If the man you were dating happened to have a family gathering that you must attend, you'd fly to Australia the next day and just disappear even though you had a live show to shoot."

"People would think, I was flying so frequently back then that it felt like I was taking a bus," Fiona quipped, laughing.

But it was unintentional on her part. Fiona said: "I just couldn't see the big picture at all."

On reflection, she added, "I really didn't make the best of the opportunities I was given or consider what other people needed or how they felt. I have some regrets about that and I feel apologetic."

She has always been the one to sacrifice a lot for her partner in her relationships, Fiona revealed, because she thinks it is worth it.

Her yearning to be loved probably stemmed from her father not being around when she was little, she tearfully shared. 

"I want someone to love me and I guess there's this desire to receive all the love I didn't get from one person." 

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She also revealed two reasons why she left at the peak of her career in 2009.

One was because her Australian-American fiance at that time did not want her to continue acting. She was also preparing to move to Hong Kong and get married. The couple later broke up in 2011 and Fiona was reported to be dating rapper Julien Leo in 2017.

Another reason was because she felt tired and had a poor command of the Chinese language.

"I've been in this line of work since I was 19 years old. I'm thankful for all the opportunities but I was also under immense pressure because of my poor Mandarin. I had to memorise lines every day, but I have a poor memory," she said.

She did not sleep well at night due to the long and irregular working hours. After realising that she was unhappy, she quit showbiz.

After a seven-year hiatus, Fiona finally returned to the small screen in 2016 with the Channel 5 series Left Behind.

She also made her Hollywood debut as Kitty Pong in Crazy Rich Asians, one of her most iconic roles to date.

ALSO READ: Fiona Xie riding out Covid-19 in Singapore, gives up work in Malaysia to spend time with family

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