'He may look flirtatious but he's afraid of trouble': Anita Yuen on managing her marriage with Julian Cheung

It's not easy maintaining a marriage for three decades, but part of the trick is in knowing your spouse very well.

In episode four of Hear U Out season four, Hong Kong actress Anita Yuen talks to local host Quan Yi Fong about maintaining her marriage with actor Julian Cheung and the early stages of their relationship.

The couple first met when filming on the set of the movie A Warrior's Tragedy (1993), marrying in 2001 and their son Morton was born in 2006.

True to her frank nature, Anita, 52, admitted that she asked him out first, saying: "We were filming in Beijing and I asked him out for dinner. I was still young and I didn't want to go back and stay in my room.

"After we talked, I felt that he was humorous, fun-loving, polite and handsome."

Anita and Julian, also 52, became an official couple a few months later. However, Anita, who entered showbiz after winning the Miss Hong Kong pageant in 1990, joked that she felt less pressure to hide their relationship than he did.

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"He was an idol singer and I was a proper actress," she quipped, implying he needed to maintain an idol image in his career while she could depend on her acting skills.

Anita added that in order to hide their relationship from the paparazzi, they "ate at less crowded restaurants, drove individually to a pier late at night to chat", or simply stayed in.

Trusting each other was also something they had to work on.

Anita elaborated on overcoming their challenges, specifically the rumours of him being romantically involved with others: "At the start of the relationship, he didn't give me a sense of security... He was humorous to everybody so there were some rumours .

"I even wondered why he had so many rumours surrounding him, as it didn't happen to me despite having been an actress for a long time. He was too playful."

She recalled she warned him to be more careful but Julian retorted and questioned why she did not trust him. However, he admitted to her that he could do better in providing her with more security.

Ultimately, Anita's faith in Julian's loyalty rests in knowing his character.

She explained: "He may look flirtatious but he is afraid of trouble, so he'd rather not do anything.

"I'm more emotional and he is more rational, so he had to learn to be more sensitive towards me. We're complementary and no one's always right or wrong."

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Even though Julian doesn't verbally express his love often, Anita fondly summarised how the couple maintain their closeness: "It's a little embarrassing, but we still cuddle on the sofa. We kiss a lot too. These things are not faked, as there is no one watching when we're home."

Contrary to conventional wisdom, Anita's sense of security in the marriage is not threatened by her husband's great maintenance in his appearance.

Elaborating further, Anita said: "I need to maintain his looks, because I need him to continue to work and bring home the bacon. What will happen (to his career) if he has a pot belly? That's why I never keep him too well-fed."

Julian's acting and singing career is going strong, especially after taking part in the China variety show Call Me By Fire in 2022. In comparison, Anita is less active in her career at the moment, with her last film being Be Water, My Friend released in 2019.

At the end of the day, she felt that there was no purpose in feeling insecure, and "she can only do her best" in her life and marriage.

Perhaps another reason why their marriage has lasted is that they see the other person's true self.

When prompted by Yi Fong, Anita listed three things he liked most about Julian: "One, he's cultured and reads a lot, so we have many things to talk about.

"Two, he's very easygoing, and that's a good balance for a high-strung person like me… It calms me down.

"Three, we wouldn't have lasted three decades without his sense of humour. Even now, we still talk about silly things and laugh together."

As for the three things she could not stand about Julian, Anita revealed that him being too easygoing was one, secondly, that he "could be quite long-winded", and lastly, that he could give himself too much pressure at times.

Yi Fong recounted that when Julian was asked the same question on episode two, he joked: "If I were to list out everything, this episode would last the entire day." To that statement, Anita laughed and acknowledged that Julian "can be very mean".

Hear U Out season four is streaming on meWATCH now.

ALSO READ: 'Why does he look young and old at the same time?' Netizens debate Julian Cheung's grey hair in Anita Yuen's vacation post

jolynn.chia@asiaone.com

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