'My biggest flaws as a parent come from my deepest hurt and insecurities': Yes 933 DJ Lim Peifen on being a stay-home mum for a year

After a one-year hiatus from work, Yes 933 DJ Lim Peifen has some realisations after being a stay-at-home mum to two boys.

In an interview with the 41-year-old radio host, she shared with theAsianparent that she needed skills that were opposite to what she had acquired all throughout the years in her career. Some of these realisations are being less rigid, becoming more patient, and taking time off for herself.

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Peifen shared: "At the start of that one-year break, I thought I could finally be 100 per cent focused on parenting, so I gave my all and my best to try and do it well. I wanted to be efficient, detailed and precise."

"I wanted to tick off boxes and achieve goals. I was so fixated that I did not pay attention to much else other than the kids and home matters. Eventually, I found myself in a dire state of frustration and anxiety."

Unlike at work where we have to be professional and focus on ticking off a to-do list, parenting is different. Some parents can relate that mums and dads should not be 100 per cent objective all the time, rather they also need to be subjective to the needs of their children and themselves.

Peifen also added one more lesson she learned as a parent:

"Some of my biggest flaws as a parent come from my deepest hurt and insecurities. I have to heal from them in order to be a better parent. The process isn't easy, it's often two steps forward one step back. But I will keep going in the right direction."

Vacation with two children overseas: How did she handle it?

The Mediacorp personality was recently seen visiting Taiwan and Switzerland along with her family. As a mum, what was her experience bringing one toddler and one kid on overseas vacations?

"Because of their current ages and their age difference, I would say 7 on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the hardest. Also, due to the fact that it was only my husband and I with the two boys. By "hard", I mean tiring and stressful, it was definitely not unpleasant."

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When asked if the trip became extra fun or extra hard when travelling with children, Peifen answered:

"Both! On every trip, we learn a little more about how to get along with each other, watch out for one another and take care of one another. We are getting better as a Team Family with every journey and holiday."

She also added that she taught a lesson to his son, Luke, during their Taiwan trip about the importance of responsible handling of travel documents. The radio host also gave some tips to parents travelling:

"Other than travel essentials, I guess for younger kids, I would say their chou chou (comfort pillow) or anything that they use to feel secure and helps them sleep. For older kids, perhaps a good book or toy can help keep them occupied during the flight and on the trip. And suitable snacks for everyone, including for adults!"

Favourite spots in Taiwan and Switzerland

These two countries are known for their amazing natural landscapes with family-friendly places. What are their family's favourite spots there?

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"For Taiwan, I think it's a close fight between Cingjing and Yeliu Geopark. The boys loved our accommodation at Cingjing."

"Our room had a wooden castle bed with two levels, a lower one that was an actual bed, and an upper level that was like a play fort, with stairs on one side and a slide on the other. The view of the mountains from our balcony was breathtaking."

"At Yeliu Geopark, it was a fun learning experience for the boys about geography and nature. The weather was beautiful when we were there."

"As for Switzerland, we really loved every part of the trip, but the boys will probably like playing in the snow a little more than the rest."

"Our stay at Grindelwald was magical, from there it was a short train ride up to Kleine Scheidegg. Luke made his first snow angel there, and we all had so much fun sledging. We are definitely taking up skiing in the near future."

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This article was first published in theAsianparent.