'No one talks about what happens after childbirth': Annette Lee opens up about her postpartum story

On her social media platforms, Annette Lee looks like she has it all — a booming career as a content creator, supportive friends and family, as well as a beautiful baby boy whom she gave birth to in November 2022. 

But what she doesn't show as often are the struggles she goes through as a new mother. 

In a detailed video uploaded last Thursday (Nov 16), Annette shared more about what she went through postpartum. 

"No one talks about what happens after childbirth," she pointed out. 

"There's so much of it that's difficult, that I feel is way more difficult than the pregnancy itself." 

Pain, body image issues and postnatal blues

Like all mothers, Annette experienced severe physical pains throughout her childbirth journey, but not in the way most people expected. 

"People say giving birth is the most painful thing ever, but let me just tell you, I didn't feel a thing because I was on the epidural," she revealed, adding that she also gave birth "a lot faster than expected". 

In fact, once the baby was out, Annette even thought to herself: "Oh wow, this wasn't as bad as they said it would be." 

But the pain only came a few hours later, after she took a nap. 

"I woke up to the most excruciating pain ever," recounted Annette. 

Little did she know that this wasn't the worst of it. 

The pain didn't go away even after she took pain killers, and Annette initially thought that it was the stitches. 

Later on, her doctor told her that very likely, when the baby was on the way out, he impacted her tailbone. 

This pain lasted her the next few days and she even had difficulties going to the bathroom. 

Another struggle she went through was breastfeeding. 

She found herself constantly waking up in the middle of the night to express milk at three-hour intervals. 

"You just feel like a cow," she put bluntly. 

It didn't help that she had a blister on one of her breasts, which made the experience even more excruciating.

And while one solution to help the blister heal was to stop pumping milk altogether, this would also mean she would risk getting mastitis, which is an infection from a clogged milk duct. 

Annette also shared that she would find herself falling sick more often because of a weakened immunity system. 

Though she didn't go out much, she fell sick around four to five times within six months. 

Apart from pain and poor health, Annette said she found herself struggling with body image issues. 

Normally, she would try to detach herself from thoughts about her body image and she also did so while she was pregnant. 

But after giving birth, she thought: "Gosh, I look terrible." 

Additionally, she was hit with the postnatal blues. 

While she was grateful that it only lasted a few weeks and wasn't "full on" postpartum depression, it still affected her nevertheless. 

Little things would trigger her and she would cry often over things like breastfeeding. 

Having to be confined to a room for several days didn't help either, especially since she was unable to work during that period. 

"The cabin fever just made me feel even more depressed and the inability to work also just made me feel very unhappy," she said, adding that she really enjoyed her work and the lack of that routine made her feel overwhelmed. 

How she coped 

Annette found different ways to tide herself through the tough times. 

For her breastfeeding issues, she engaged a breast masseuse who not only helped her with the physical pain, but also aided her in managing her breastfeeding schedule. 

After four months, she stopped breastfeeding. 

While she said she felt a bit of guilt over this, she learned that everyone, their bodies and their lifestyles are different. 

"At the end of the day, you must put your own mental health first. That's how you can function and do everything else and take care of your baby," she said. 

A wardrobe full of a good selection of clothes was something else that helped make her feel better. 

"Because of that whole period where I started to just feel gross and ugly, I started to think a lot more about wearing things that made me feel good," she shared. 

A great support group full of mothers like herself also helped the process. 

"I realised that having mums around you is so important," she shared. 

"I had a few mum-friends around me and it was so sweet how talking to them helped me get through a lot of difficult times." 

ALSO READ: Experience labour pains with this birth simulator in JB

melissateo@asiaone.com