SINGAPORE — Shortly after she asked a senior executive at work for career guidance, Clarissa (not her real name) received two calls from an anonymous person informing her that the colleague was a married man.
The 40-year-old sales executive said their relationship was a professional one, and she was offended by the caller's insinuation that she was having an affair with him.
The calls marked the start of two years of torment when she was harassed and stalked online by a person who assumed false identities in various social media accounts.
She later realised that the harasser was her colleague's wife.
Clarissa, who is single, said: "I was very spooked. I didn't know what she was capable of and what falsehoods she could spread.
"I was afraid she would spread falsehoods and kill my career opportunities."
Among other acts of harassment, the wife started about a dozen social media accounts under fake identities, at times using the names of Clarissa's colleagues, presumably so that Clarissa would accept her friend request.
Each time Clarissa deleted a fake or suspicious account, the wife would start a new one to monitor her posts and send her inappropriate, vexing or weird messages.
Clarissa's colleagues had an inkling of who was responsible, as the woman had previously harassed another co-worker.
Clarissa said: "Many people told me to ignore her messages or to let it go. But she didn't stop. I felt that enough was enough."
She lodged a police report and also went to the Protection from Harassment Court to apply for a protection order — which restrains the harasser from continuing the harassment — against the wife.
A breach of the protection order is an offence that is punishable by a fine of up to $5,000 or a jail term not exceeding six months, or both.
By then, she had spent six months gathering evidence of the wife's harassing messages and actions, and she compiled a report that came up to about 150 pages.
In response to Clarissa's court application, the wife denied through her lawyer that she was harassing Clarissa.
She also offered to sign an undertaking not to harass Clarissa if she dropped the application for the order, while continuing to insist the undertaking was not an admission of guilt.
Clarissa said: "I told her I believe she is guilty and if the harassment continues, I would pursue the protection order again."
The harassment stopped after that. But it took a toll on Clarissa.
She said her mind was "all over the place" and her work performance was affected.
She was also pursuing a part-time diploma course to improve her career prospects, but that also took a hit given all the mental duress she was under.
What helped her was the counselling provided at no cost by SheCares@SCWO. The centre also referred her to a lawyer, who gave her legal advice pro bono.
SheCares@SCWO is Singapore's first support centre for victims of online harms. It was launched in 2023 by non-profit group SG Her Empowerment and the Singapore Council of Women's Organisations.
Clarissa said: "SheCares@SCWO counsellors truly cared, and they were the first people who did not minimise what I was going through. They validated how I felt."
This article was first published in The Straits Times. Permission required for reproduction.
