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Waiting to say thank-you: Tears flow as bone marrow recipients meet donors for first time

Waiting to say thank-you: Tears flow as bone marrow recipients meet donors for first time
A delighted Mr Lim Wee Kiat meeting his bone marrow recipient, Ho Wen Qing, for the first time on Sept 21.
PHOTO: The Straits Times

When Mr Lim Wee Kiat was studying at Nanyang Technological University, he decided to impress a fellow student he had a crush on in an unusual way – by signing up as a bone marrow donor at a booth set up by the Bone Marrow Donor Programme (BMDP).

“She was telling me, ‘Hey, this is something that’s good, you should sign up’,” he recalled. “I just wanted to impress her, I didn’t even know what it was about.”

That impulsive decision resurfaced about five years later, in 2019, when Mr Lim was found to be a match for a young girl battling aplastic anaemia. The severe condition where the body fails to produce sufficient new blood cells is estimated to affect up to four in every one million people and can be fatal if left untreated.

The decision to donate his marrow was an easy one for Mr Lim, now 32, and in doing so he helped save the life of then four-year-old Ho Wen Qing.

He was speechless and in tears as he embraced Wen Qing when they met for the first time on Sept 21 at an event organised by the BMDP.

The two were one of 10 donor-recipient pairs to meet at the event, which was held at an event space in the Bidadari area in conjunction with World Marrow Donor Day.

Now nine, Wen Qing stands at less than 1m tall and weighs about 11kg. She also has kidney, vision and hearing problems.

Mr Lim said he “barely felt anything” during the nine-hour-long donation process, which involved the collection of peripheral blood stem cells. “It was so overwhelming to see someone and know that person is alive because of a small action that you did,” said the electrical engineer.

Coincidentally, Mr Lim’s university crush, Ms Choo Wan Qi, now his wife, was also identified as a marrow donor for another patient in 2020. Ms Choo went through with the donation that year.

Wen Qing’s father, Mr Ho Choong On, a 61-year-old operations manager, said: “All this while we’ve wanted to meet the donor. We’ve been waiting for the opportunity to say thank you to him.”

Mr Lim Wee Kiat was speechless and in tears when he embraced his bone marrow recipient, Ho Wen Qing, at an event organised by the BMDP.  ST PHOTO: GAVIN FOO

Also meeting for the first time was Ms Nur Siti Zubaidah, who in 2020, donated her marrow to Ria Nadira, then aged eight.

Ria’s father, Mr Muhamad Rizal Monin, 40, said his daughter was diagnosed with thalassemia major – an inherited blood disorder that affects the body’s ability to produce haemoglobin and healthy red blood cells – when she was three, after it was found that she had an enlarged spleen.

When Ria was four, she started undergoing blood transfusion every few months due to her low haemoglobin levels, said Mr Rizal, a safety, security and compliance head.

Bone marrow recipient Ria Nadira meeting her donor, Ms Nur Siti Zubaidah, for the first time on Sept 21. ST PHOTO: GAVIN FOO

The regular transfusions had side effects such as elevated levels of iron in Ria’s blood, and it became more difficult to find a suitable vein over time for the procedure, said Mr Rizal, adding that it was a financial burden on the family.

Noting the family would regularly see older children and teenagers waiting to receive blood transfusions when Ria went for her procedures, Mr Rizal said it was a blessing when they were informed of a potential donor.

“No parents want their children to go through that, so we are just grateful,” he said.

Describing the opportunity to help Ria as a “miracle”, Ms Zubaidah said she had signed up to be a bone marrow donor again.

“If there’s another possible match, I want to be able to continue giving forward,” said the 27-year-old student care teacher.

Bone marrow recipient Ria Nadira (third from left) and her family meeting her donor, Ms Nur Siti Zubaidah, on Sept 21. ST PHOTO: GAVIN FOO

Malays make up 8 per cent of BMDP’s registry of 123,866 marrow donors, while Indians make up about 9 per cent.

BMDP notes that a patient’s best chance of finding a donor could be with someone from the same ethnicity, as human leukocyte antigen markers – a type of molecule that plays an important part in the body’s immune response – used in matching are inherited, with some ethnic groups possessing more complex tissue types than others.

It urged all eligible members of the public, especially Malays and Indians, to register themselves as donors.

Established in 1993 by Mr Gerald Loong and his wife after they lost their young son to leukaemia, BMDP is the first and only marrow donor registry in Singapore. Over the past 31 years, the programme has helped facilitate 1,165 patient transplants and 520 marrow donations.

This article was first published in The Straits Times. Permission required for reproduction.

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